You NEED to go to Portland. Here’s why.
I recently spent five glorious days in Portland and I’m still raving about it to anyone who’ll listen. I bump into you in a public bathroom? I’m telling you how pretty Portland is, with its cool old houses and eerie X-Files-ish forests. We make eye contact in a lift? You’ve just signed up for an impassioned speech about how friendly Portlandians are – so laid-back and welcoming. You’re giving me a Serious Talk about bailing up my co-workers in toilets and elevators? I’m telling you to relaaaax, ‘cause everything and everyone is chilled-out in Portland.
In Portland, rushing from tourist spot to tourist spot just doesn’t feel right. It’s the kind of place where you want to stay a bit longer and take your time. Even my five days didn’t feel long enough! Here’s why:
1. The neighbourhoods
Downtown Portland is fun, but Portland’s heart – and its best restaurants, bars, and shops – are in its neighbourhoods. And because Portland’s public transport is amazing (so cheap! So frequent!), it’s easy to go exploring. Don’t miss the Pearl District, Nob Hill, Concordia, Boise-Eliot, or Mississippi.
2. The houses
There’s another reason you’ll want to spend some serious time in Portland’s neighbouhoods – the gorgeous houses.
Like this tin one.
Or this purple one.
In fact, most of Portland’s must-visit restaurants, bars, and boutiques are housed in… well, old houses. Which is great, because it made me feel a bit less stalky for taking so many photos.
3. The shopping
Even if you’re not a shopper, hear me out. Portland is home to some seriously unique stores that you’ve got to at least browse. We’re talking vintage boutiques…
Like Flutter
..organic and alternative food…
Like The Meadow, with its emphasis on salt cooking
..and the incredibly specialised.
Like Sunlan Lighting, aka the light bulb store. It sells light bulbs. That’s it. You have absolutely no reason to go here. And yet I totally recommend it.
My absolutely fave is Paxton Gate, an incredible rabbit hole of vintage taxidermy, natural curiosities, and handmade gifts and jewellery. The staff are champs and don’t mind if you take photos (which I guarantee you will).
Paxton Gate
4. Powell’s Books
Powell’s City of Books is the world’s largest independent bookstore and epic enough to deserve its own bullet point. It’s spread over four levels and an entire city block, and it’s easy to lose an afternoon there. Forget about that spare room you thought you had in your suitcase – it was doomed the moment you walked through the door.
Shut up and take my money!
Keep an eye out for the pole of autographs. It’s in the gold room, near the horror section.
5. ALL THE FOOD
Portland doesn’t do big chains. I don’t spot a single McDonald’s, KFC, Popeyes, In-N-Out Burger or anything. What it does do is independent, local, and delicious food, with a particular focus on organic and vegie-friendly menus.
My top pick? Pok Pok on SE Division Street. It’s legendary for its authentic Thai and Southeast Asian noms, and Ike’s Vietnamese fish sauce wings are its signature dish. They are life-changing.
EAT THESE
My very satisfied tummy also recommends the Imperial for simple, yet elegant Pacific Northwestern cuisine, Kim Jong Smokehouse for Korean-style street food fused with Southern-style barbecue, Wiz Bang Bar for gourmet soft serve, and Blue Star for delicious (and surprisingly sophisticated) doughnuts.
6. The bars
Two words: $2 beers. Portland’s drinks are surprisingly cheap and the local craft beer/microbrewery scene is a dream for suds fans. As for the bars, they’re as diverse and wonderful as Portland itself. My gold star goes to Dig A Pony for its solid beer list, Western gothic vibes, and old-school photobooth.
Dig A Pony
But I’ve got to give an honourable mention to Ground Kontrol – a retro-futuristic video arcade with alcohol. It has a huge number of machines, all priced from 25c to 50c a game. And the ceilings in the toilets look like this:
7. The wine
The Willamette Valley’s wineries are world-famous and just an hour’s drive from Downtown. There are heaps are day tours available, but even if you don’t make it out, you shouldn’t have any trouble finding a local drop. Our hotel, the Kimpton Hotel Vintage Portland, has free wine tastings and canapes every afternoon. We pop in once or twice 😉
8. The waterfalls
Oregon has some spectacular parks and woodlands, even in and around its biggest city. The Columbia River Gorge falls (including the famous Multnomah Falls) are about an hour’s drive from Downtown, with stunning scenery on the way. We go on a half-day tour with America’s Hub, which is brilliant.
TLC were wrong. You should definitely chase these things.
Dorks at a waterfall.
For a full-day option, check out this tour that includes Wy’east (Mount Hood). Wy’east is Oregon’s highest mountain AND a (potentially) active volcano. It’s also home to the Timberline Lodge, which is a big must-visit for horror fans. It served as the exterior for the Overlook Hotel in the original film adaptation of The Shining. “Heeeere’s Johnny!”
9. The Witch’s Castle
So it’s not really a castle and there aren’t any witches. But who cares? This crumbly old cabin in Forest Park is the perfect spot to practice your resting witch face. The hike to get there – less than 1km from Upper Macleay parking lot and a bit over 1km from Lower Macleay Parking – is pretty special, too.
The Witch’s Castle.
10. The Japanese Garden
When His Excellency Nobuo Matsunaga – the former Ambassador of Japan to the United States – visited Portland’s Japanese Garden, he declared it to be “the most beautiful and authentic Japanese garden in the world outside of Japan,” which is some seriously high praise. It’s great for a stroll (and about a million photos 😉).
Portland Japanese Garden.
That reflection…😍
11. The Simpsons spotting
Simspons fans, prepare to have your minds blown. Oregon is home to THE Springfield. Series creator Matt Groening once accidentally confirmed it, then took it back. But even if he now denies it, the evidence is clear. Groening grew up in Portland (on Evergreen Terrace, no less!) and named many of the major characters after Portland streets. Walk down the main drag in Nob Hill and you’ll spot Lovejoy, Kearney, Quimby, Burnside, and Flanders Streets. And on the sidewalk outside Lincoln High School, there’s this neat little piece of Bart graffiti, drawn by Groening himself.
12. The weirdness (which isn’t actually that weird)
Portland has a reputation for being proudly weird, but you know what? I don’t think it is. It’s just that the city and its residents have a particular idea of themselves and the community they want to live in. They enthusiastically support small, local business, so even those that target niche or “weird” interests get a chance to shine. There’s room for everyone.
Of course, I’m someone who gets excited about being chopped up by aliens at the Freakybuttrue Peculiarium. So maybe you shouldn’t trust my judgement about what’s “weird” 👽
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