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REPORT: MISSION CRITICAL MARKET ANALYSIS

KEY BUSINESS OBJECTIVES

  • Enhance out-of-the-box supply chains
  • Innovate mission-critical paradigms
  • Recontexualise B2C e-markets
  • Transition vertical markets
  • Aggregate ubiquitous applications
  • Revolutionise leading-edge communities
  • Target leading-edge web-readiness
  • Synergise front-end communities
  • Integrate sexy partnerships
  • Implement compelling niches

CAUSE AND EFFECTS

48% of people don’t take their annual leave, which not only means their morale is low, but their minds are overloaded with endless statistics, impossible KPIs, and unnecessary jargon. This makes them less productive and more inclined to go cray-cray (almost certainly at a boozy work function, right in front of the CEO). Instead of sitting poolside in Ibiza with a cocktail in hand as they scope out the local, sun-kissed talent they’re slaving away at their desk sipping instant coffee sludge out of a chipped token ‘I went here’ souvenir mug they picked up a thousand years ago. Not taking annual leave can also result in dangerous side effects, including Stapled Finger Syndrome (caused by short attention spans), Loony Tunes Mirage Disorder (visual hallucinations of tropical mirages, which some hapless sufferers try to swim in), and Telephonium Lingua Confusionem (speaking foreign languages when answering phones, as if on vacation). It’s also been discovered that the office’s slow internet speed shouldn’t be blamed on Adam in Accounting for his constant streaming of illicit Kim Kardashian videos, but our employees’ copious searches on lastminute.com.au. Every day, 54% of the people in this office browse for holiday inspiration and last-minute vacation deals, but back out due to work commitments and deadlines (#boo).

IMPLEMENTATION

The implementation of compulsory holidays coupled with an annual “Get Outta Here!” travel bonus would have an amazing effect on each team and line of business, as well as the company’s overall productivity and gross profit levels. It would enable employees to follow their tripspiration and then return to work revitalised and ready to go!

Imagine scrapping work bullsh*t for bula, ditching KPIs for Kuala Lumpur, or saying f*ck it and flying to Phuket on a #livelastminute deal

Lastminute.com.au has deals for all of these and more, so all those searches clogging up our internet tubes need not be in vain!